so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
