i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
The best revenge is premature balding
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
