There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
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