It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
high people should be assigned attendants
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Randomize
