Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize