Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
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