Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
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