It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
