I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
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