For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize