Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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