i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
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