come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
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