What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Randomize
