Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
