apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize
