I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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