I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
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I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
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I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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