I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
do herpes really smell.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
