All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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