Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
