I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
