Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Randomize
