The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Randomize
