8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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