i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
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