At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Randomize