Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Randomize