Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize