My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
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