just come out here and I will go home with you...
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
