we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
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