ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
