This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Randomize