she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
