she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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