You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
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Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
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And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye