kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
