The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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