You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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