Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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