He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
i think i just lost a toe
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
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