I'll bet she douches with gravy.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
