I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize