Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
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