So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
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