I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
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