Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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