The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Randomize