Dual....:-)
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Randomize
