Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
