So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
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